Sunday, the 8th of December, 1907.

There is death in life, and it astonishes me that we pretend to ignore this: death, whose unforgiving presence we experience with each change we survive because we must learn to die: That I all of life.

Rainer Maria Rilke

Grief is a beautiful part of life, an inevitable one. This life is just one big lesson that teaches us to constantly let go and it can be a transformative part of who we are if we allow it. We not only mourn physical deaths, but emotional and spiritual ones - who can teach us how to let go if not ourselves?

Recently my grandpa’s sister passed away and it switched something in me. Death is not a foreign concept, it lives close to all of us. It broke my heart thinking of my grandpa mourning his sister - but seeing him handle it so gracefully showed me that I must learn to come to terms with grieving life too. The only thing in life that is promised is that we will all one day die - that can either make every day more meaningful or you can live with that dread that nothing matters.

When I called my grandpa to see how he was doing he sounded cheerful, quite the opposite of what I had expected. My grandpa is a man of few words, but whenever he speaks it is like he always knows exactly what to say. His sister lived til the age of 92 and she lived a beautiful life, he expressed how lucky he felt to have had someone like her as his sister. How he spoke of her touched me, his words weren’t full of sadness, but rather of joy in the life that she got to live. Can we all learn to celebrate the life we have lived rather than mourn what is gone? A practice that can make all our lives more precious and present.

My grandpa shared those words with my sister, it means life goes on and we must fill it with love. It feels like a wonderful gift to witness my grandpa at an old age celebrate the life he has left most presently and humbly. No day is taken for granted and it teaches me that as long as the sun is shining in my cold face I am lucky. I want to learn to not let my fear of the unknown consume me, I want to be a student in life. Always being attentive to what every season of life has to show me.

Savoring every moment I am gifted —putting more effort into not allowing anxiety, stress & worry to affect what life has to offer me.

Last night I saw an interview with Andrew Garfield about grief when he lost his mom, he shared a beautiful passage that was exactly what I needed to hear to finish this post.

Grief will always remain near, but so will the love…..

With love,

Joanna